Wow!

It's early days but today is a day for celebration!

Friday- Still a Wee Bit Coo-Coo (Cockoo)

Today started with a crying jag. No real "rational" reason but it happened anyway. The Mister just held on to me and then reminded me that I did the exact same thing the last time. I realized that it did sound familiar.

Huh. Why?

I looked at my old chart and sure enough he's right. I was a blubbering idiot on 10 DPO. Why 10 days? I remember also that another woman in a support blog said that 5-7 days after transfer always seems to be hard.

I think it's because we all Google and Bing for answers. How soon should a pg test register positive? 8, 9, 10 days? Well, then if mine isn't positive it must mean that I'm not pregnant.... In reality, we're all different. All embryos are different and some are just faster hCG producers than others.

Of course I can say this now as I sit calmly waiting for tomorrow to come. Probably I'll wake up at 4:00 AM again, cry and act like the end of the universe is upon me if I don't see two lines. My hope is that two little lines will show up and we'll get to celebrate. Here's to tears of happiness from now on.

Some days I wish I was a blissfully ignorant fertile who had no clue about all these scary details. It's crazy making. However, I need to remember we are who we are today because of these experiences. That's a good thing. A very good thing.

Going Bonkers

The Two Week Wait (2ww) is the hardest part. I am seriously going nuts. I'm 8 days past ovulation (8dpo) and feeling blue. I am so annoyed at myself. I keep having bad dreams about not being pg. I hope all it means is that I'm worried/anxious.

I'm so scared to test and have it be negative. I think it's worse this time because I want to believe the zings/pokes/cramps I had on Monday were an embryo digging in. It was similar to last time when I felt something, but this time it happened earlier. So then I think couldn't have been anything- too early....but I think it was. Stick little one. Stick!

Normal. Normal. Normal. I know it is normal to feel this way. Doesn't help much.

Thanks for all the continued good vibes, prayers and support. I can't tell you how much it means to us.

We're home now! I didn't lift any luggage or anything. I've been very good. The Mister looked like a Sherpa in the airports. He was smiling and promised he didn't mind.

We ended up with 2 frozen embryos- one day 5 expanding grade B and one Day 6 expanded grade A. We're happy to have that many when many women don't get any.

Now we wait. I don't like the wait. I hope that work keeps my mind from wandering too much.

Thanks to everyone for the prayers, positive thoughts and good vibes. Please keep them coming. XOXO