Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Very Sad News

Dear Friends/Family,
Our twins passed away unexpectedly. I had spotting yesterday and went directly to the OB expecting to see heartbeats and to hear that it was nothing to worry about. Instead I was told that there were no heartbeats with either of them. They measured approx 11 weeks. The last u/s we had where we got to see them dancing about was very close to the day they passed.

The Mister was out of town but immediately returned to my side after driving for 2 1/2 hours. This morning was the D&C. I chose that route rather than miscarrying at home due to the age of the babies and the fact that there were 2 fetuses. It was not something I believed I could do on my own.

This morning my stomach was almost flat- 1/2 of what it used to be. Couldn't believe it. Spotting continued through the night but nothing scary.

Everyone was very kind and supportive today. I got a little happy juice in my IV early to help get me through the wait.

The Mister hasn't left my side. He appears as if by magic when the sadness over-takes me. Dr told him how sorry and shocked she was that this happened. She said it was unlikely to an immune issue with me because the pg had gone so long. And she didn't think it was a chromosome issue for the same reason. That leaves only a bad luck scenario or something specific to the twin's circumstance- cords, placenta, etc. Unfortunately we will never know.

In the coming days I will be posting how we are doing and how I am coping. Just know that this grieving process will take many shapes and may be hard to read. Please do not feel obligated to read or comment. I know this will be hard on you too.

We love and thank you for taking this journey with us. Our hearts are broken but we still have hope that some day we will have a take-home baby. The hope is dim today but I'm sure it will brighten some day soon.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Twin Economics- The Beginning

As we get deeper into this journey the economics of it all is bubbling to the surface. I'm reading a great book called "Juggling Twins". The author is very funny, thank God, because when she gives the good news that disposable diapering will run $1600 minimum the first year....one might unintentionally pee their pants.

While we knew we'd be working on a budget and watching our pennies, the full concept has really hit home. The Mister wanted to stop and look baby furniture a week ago so we went to Baby Depot (not a place I'd frequent too often- a little, well... ucky) where they have good deals. We purused the entire crib, stroller and car seat area to get an idea of what we were looking at, realizing we need TWO of most things. *Swallow*

We committed to ourselves to get what we can used. I have no issues looking for good, used items for the babies. They grow so fast that buying EVERYTHING new is just silly, especially since we won't be having more kids.

So, I scoped out garage sales for this past Saturday. We drug sweet Sydney with us, she rode along in her nightgown, curlers in her hair (party) and only complained about 10 times. Not bad. The first BIG neighborhood garage sale was almost a bust except that as we drove out I spied a double stroller....STOP! He did.

What we found was a black and beige Graco DuoGlider with 2 car seats and 2 bases. It had a price tag of $100. The nicest (and skinniest-which gives me hope) Mom of boy/girl twins came over to tell us all about it. I sent the Mister to go see how much money was in my wallet ($4) to add to his cash ($63). The thing was literally rolled out of the garage, had cookie/cracker crumbs, stains and one missing canopy shade. But, it would clean up and we could order a new canopy. It was well loved but the babies can only ride in the carrier-type car seats for a few months anyway and then we'll put them in bigger new carseats that they'll use until they don't need any seats anymore. After confirming the seats had never been in an accident, She took our $67 happily and bid us farewell and good luck. I've already downloaded the instruction manual. I need to call Graco customer service for the replacement canopy. Looks like it'll be about $19! Yay!

Later Saturday I drug the fam out again (Syd was included because she bailed on her friends party and therefore her consequence was having to go shopping with us) to go to some thrift stores. Found nothing except at the last place. A double jogger stroller. It's in even better shape than the DuoGlider and it was $34.99! It's an InStep 10K. The only thing "wrong" with it was a repair to the rubber on the handle. Who cares! Yay us! When we go camping, hiking/walking or to the park we are set. That's all we'll need in strollers unless they bug each other to the point of having to split them up in separate strollers. Which could happen because I've read and the DuoGlider skinny lady confirmed that she had to stop using the Duo and get a side by side because the twin in the back was kicking the seat of the twin riding in front. That makes me laugh. How funny will that be to start watching them bug each other?! Forgive me, I digress....


So one Saturday yielded: 1 DuoGlider Travel System, 2 carseats (fit the stroller) and 2 bases (for the car); 1 InStep 10K double jogging stroller- Total spent $102. Actual retail for all items, new= $500 approx. Can I get a "Hell Yeah!" everybody?

I tried to find pictures on the web to upload but none worked well. You'll have to Google them yourselves if you want to take a look.

Now to defray the cost of disposables, we're discussing the option of cloth. With all the new fangled covers and inserts I'm seriously confused. The closest store that has them in stock so I can touch and try them out is 80 miles away. I love the g dipes option...not as inexpensive but great for the environment and they have cotton/hemp inserts now as well. The thought of washing dipes is a bit daunting...the cost for sposies for twins is terrifying. OK, that's a little dramatic but it's scary none the less. This will be our next endeavor....diapering butts.

How cute is this?---->

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

12 Weeks!